It Takes a Village—For Dads Too: Social Support in the First Year

Becoming a parent is often described as one of life’s most transformative experiences. The phrase “it takes a village” is frequently used to emphasize the importance of support during this transition—but too often, that village is built around mothers and infants, leaving fathers standing just outside its gates. In the United States, fathers often receive less support from  healthcare systems than mothers, limiting their preparation for becoming a father.

Although some fathers may feel unprepared to take care of their babies, they consistently express a strong desire to be involved in their child’s care (Copeland et al., 2023). Research consistently shows that fathers want to be involved—but wanting to be involved and being supported to do so are not the same thing. Across multiple studies, a clear message emerges: fathers need support in the first year after birth, and too often, they are not getting it (Copeland et al., 2023; Griffith et al., 2025; & Leahy-Warren et al., 2022).

Fathers want to be active participants in the care of their babies, but require greater support from hospital, physicians, and nurses to effectively fulfill this role.

New Fatherhood: High Expectations, Limited Support

Modern fatherhood looks very different from previous generations. Fathers increasingly see themselves as active caregivers and equal parenting partners rather than secondary helpers. This shift is reflected in their expectations in the father role (Griffith et al., 2025).

In their exploration of expectant and new fathers, Griffith and colleagues found that many men actively seek out resources to prepare for parenthood but struggle to find information tailored to their needs. Fathers described a lack of accessible, relevant guidance—particularly around infant care and supporting their partners. Similarly, Copeland and colleagues (2023) identified gaps in information provided by hospital professionals, especially among experienced fathers seeking guidance on integrating a new baby into the family.

Further, Leahy-Warren and colleagues highlight that fathers expect to be recognized as equal parenting partners. However, these expectations often clash with reality. Many fathers report feeling excluded from maternity services and overlooked in healthcare interactions, despite their desire to be involved.

The result is a clear disconnect: fathers are ready to step in, but systems are not ready to include them.

Feeling Like an Outsider in the “Village”

A consistent theme across the literature is fathers’ sense of invisibility within support systems that are largely designed for mothers.

Healthcare settings can unintentionally reinforce this dynamic. Fathers frequently describe feeling like observers rather than active participants during prenatal visits, childbirth education, postnatal care, and well-child check-ups. Even when present, they may not be directly addressed or engaged by healthcare professionals (Copeland et al., 2023).

This lack of inclusion extends beyond healthcare. Parenting resources—books, classes, online materials—are often written with mothers as the primary audience, leaving fathers to adapt general advice or search independently for relevant information.

For fathers in urban environments, these challenges can be even more pronounced. Copeland and colleagues (2023) found that support is often inconsistent and dependent on individual circumstances. Rather than being embedded into systems, support frequently emerges informally—if at all—through partners, family members, or friends.

In other words, the “village” exists, but fathers are not always invited in.

What Fathers Actually Need

Research indicates that support for fathers must be intentional, multifaceted, and inclusive. Fathers’ social support needs can be understood through four key domains, as defined by House’s (1981) Social Support Theory.

1. Informational Support (Advice, Guidance, Education)

Fathers want practical, straightforward information. This includes learning how to care for an infant, understanding developmental milestones, and knowing how to support their partner physically and emotionally.

Example—A pediatric nurse teaches a father how to soothe an infant with colic.

Without this information, many fathers report feeling unprepared and uncertain in their role.

2. Emotional Support (Empathy, Love, Trust, and Caring)

The transition to fatherhood involves emotional challenges such as stress, anxiety, and identity shifts. Social expectations may discourage men from expressing vulnerability, leaving many fathers without an outlet.

Example--The father’s mother listens to him as he expresses his concerns about taking care of his baby.

Leahy-Warren and colleagues (2023) emphasize that emotional support is essential for fathers to fully engage as parenting partners, yet it is often lacking.

3. Instrumental Support (Tangible Aid and Services)

Time and opportunity are critical. Fathers benefit from paternity leave, flexible work arrangements, and hands-on caregiving opportunities. Support from family and friends can also provide relief and allow fathers to maintain personal and relationship well-being.

Example--The father’s mother-in-law baby-sits while the father and baby’s mother goes out for dinner.

It is important that health care professionals engage fathers in infant care. Copeland et al. (2023) highlight that when fathers have opportunities to be physically involved in the care of their baby, their confidence and engagement increase. Without these opportunities, their involvement may be limited.

4. Appraisal (Feedback and Self-Evaluation)

Fathers’ identities matter. Appraisal support helps fathers evaluate their role and develop confidence in their parenting identity. Healthcare providers play an important role in reinforcing positive fathering behaviors. In addition, it is important for HCPs to explore how the father identifies “fathering” in his family and how his cultural beliefs affect his fathering style. Many fathers identify role models that they emulate in their father role (Copeland et al., 2023).

Example-The father states that his uncle is his role model, and he wants to father his child just like his uncle did for his children.

When fathers appraised their needs in early parenthood, Griffith and colleagues (2025) found that fathers requested more information on:

1)     Infant development

2)     Maternal physical and mental health needs

3)     Financial responsibilities

4)     Family planning

5)     Navigating the healthcare and social systems

6)     Mental health resource for both parents

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Building a Village That Includes Fathers

If the goal is to support families effectively, then fathers must be included intentionally—not as an afterthought, but as central participants.

This begins in healthcare. Providers can significantly influence father involvement by actively engaging fathers, addressing them directly, and including them in education and decision-making.

Improved resources are also essential. Father-specific parenting materials that are practical, relatable, and accessible can help bridge existing knowledge gaps (Griffith et al., 2025).

Community support is equally important. Peer groups, father-focused programs, and local initiatives can create environments where fathers feel seen and supported and understood—particularly in urban settings, where support systems may be fragmented (Copeland et al., 2023).

Finally, policy changes are necessary. Paternity leave and flexible workplace policies are not luxuries; they are essential tools that allow fathers to be present during the most important early months of their child’s life. Leahy-Warren and colleagues emphasize the importance of these broader socio-cultural and policy supports within their ecological model of fatherhood (2023).

A Village Worth Building

The first year of a child’s life is a time of rapid change, deep connection, and significant adjustment for both parents. Fathers are ready to be part of this journey and should be actively supported by families, communities, healthcare professionals, and policymakers.

When fathers are supported and empowered, the benefits are extended to their partners, their children, and the entire family system.

It takes a village to raise a child.

It also takes a village to support a father.

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References

Copeland, D. B., Lee, B. L., Sams-Abiodun, P., & de Montigny. (2023). Perceptions of urban father support in early parenthood: A critical incident analysis. Comprehensive Child and Adolescent Nursing, 46(4), 320-347. https://doi.org/10.1080/24694193.2023.2250448

Griffith, D. M., Jaeger, E. C., Pepperman, P., Chustz, K. A., Frazier, D., & Wilson, A. (2025). Expectant and new fathers say they need resources and sources of support. BC Pregnancy and Childbirth, 25(205), 1-10. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12884-025-07290-z

House, J. S. (1981). Work stress and social support. Addison-Wesley.

Leahy-Warren, P., Philpott, L., Elmir, R., & Schmied, V. (2023). Fathers' expectations and experiences of support to be a parenting partner during the perinatal period: A scoping review.

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